Are You Ready?
I know Nicho is! Me? Not so much. Honestly, Reebok should have added in fine print below The whole 'Are You Ready?' Question:
To vomit?
To get Rhabdo?
To Have your soul broken?
Perhaps find Religion?
Become a glassy eyed post WOD zombie?
To collect large dog poop?
Find Dave Castro's address? (so you can send him a present of the above item)
I find personalized sentiments to be a nice touch. If you read my Thank you card it would say this:
Dearest Mr. Castro,
You are a programming genius! Thank you for creating WODs that help me relive the awesomeness of morning sickness, the importance of knowing whom among my Box can perform CPR and Best of all, reminding me that a 8 year old doing CrossFit Kids can kick my ass. Now, that's priceless....
To honor your greatness I have enclosed a very special gift. I have been told it brings luck to those who step on it. I am convinced that this is true considering, I didn't knock on your door and junk punch you once you answered.
Yours Truly,
K
Of course I'm joking, I really hated morning sickness! I woke up in the middle of the night in pain and it occurred to me that I wan't properly prepared for all this. Hmm....Now what could I do diffrently? I got it, I should have done this:
CF Games '13 disaster survival kit.
- Protein bars - Fuel up the tank of the love machine...
- My Primary Doctor's Phone number - This way I can ask him to write me a note to excuse me from participation. I mean, I wanted to do it but my Doctor said I should take it easy....
- Inhaler - It's more of a prop to provide back up for my crusade to obtain a note.
- Defibrillator - CLEAR! In case I don't get my note. I very well may suffer a heart attack.
- A Bike Helmet - Since I'll be a staggering, brainless walking around the box post WOD.
- 5 Gallon Bucket - My "collection" container when I expel the demon.
- Heavy weight trash bags - To throw away my demon juice saturated clothing items.
- Anti-bacterial wipes - Basically I melt, not just sweat...I'm like a fricken iceberg in the middle of summer.
- Large box of Kleenex - Because I'm so damn weak sauce soft.
- 5 Gallon water jug - To drink water AND a bathtub for me. (Yes, I can fit in one.)
- 2 Beach Towels - (1) for the pools of sweat (EWW). (1) for after my bath....
- My blankie - That way I have something to cuddle with as I'm rocking back and forth in the corner suffering from shock.
- Ciroc Vodka - To obliterate the memory of the Open WOD. I'm being pro-active. If not I'd suffer some mean PTSD!
- Cranberry juice - I need vitamin C AND a mixer. Don't hate on me because I put my overall health first & my liver second.
- Cooler with ice - For injuries, recovery and my drinks. Okay you got me, it's only for my drinks...After a few, a miracle recovery happens & I start to dance.
- Lost Child Tag on a Lanyard - Because we all know I'll be wandering aimlessly. A grown woman in a bike helmet. Please return me to my Mommy.
- Gigantic Bottle of Ibuprofen - For the impending pain and/or the hangover.
Don't get me wrong, I secretly love the torture. Participating in the Open exposes every weakness I have. It sucks however, I surprised myself a few times but overall there are 2 undeniable truths: I need to work on EVERYTHING & I need to make my survival kit for next year. Three down, 2 more to go! Pray for me people, pray hard!
Blog ya later,
Kathy
